In the past few weeks many changes have taken place and this past Saturday I found myself in tears, crying out to the Lord. I came to the end of my ropes and, as strong as I perceive to be, I could not hold on any longer. Somehow, some way, in the midst of all this chaos, I took my eyes off of the Maker of all things and led myself to believe that it came down to me to fix things, to make something happen. I was alone in my apartment, crying out to the Lord. There were questions of what His plans were in the upcoming months. I didn't know what my next step was. I asked God "where?", "when?" and "how?". He responded with a soft whisper "wait and trust Me". I pouted and cried like a 5 year old. :\
Woe to me.
The the Comforter, along with encouraging brothers and sisters, reminded me of Philippians 1:6 which says "being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."
I had forgotten that the Lord had His hand upon me, that he was guiding me through every single step. I had to pick myself up and bounce back into reality, back into His promises. Not only is my King loving but He is faithful. I realized that even when I find myself on my knees crying and questioning His ways, He never forsakes me and He holds me in His hands. He knows the limits to my strengths and weaknesses. And above all of that, His plans for me are greater than mine.
Though I had given Him my all, I was still left in a position of not knowing what my next steps were and there was no reason to be careless and irresponsible. So, I called my management when I arrived home from work today. I wanted to speak to them about the terms and conditions of my lease, to prepare myself as I was terminating my contract.
What a moment of relief!
You see, I moved into this apartment 5 months ago. And with a 12 month contract, the terms of my contract states IF I violated the lease, my penalty would be $2,000 AND the responsibility of paying the rent until the end of my agreed 12 month term (unless a new/replacement tenant took over the payment). This was VERY heavy on my shoulders as I live by myself and off of my own earned income.
HOWEVER, are you ready for the GOOD news? PTL, that as of 2 months ago CBU (Calvary Baptist University, the college neighboring my apartment complex) purchased our property. I had no idea what this meant for me until my property manager explained that CBU's plans for our community was to change it from public housing to school housing. What does that mean? Well since CBU had purchased the property, they had made plans to renovate and change alot of things over. One of these changes was that they had WAIVED EARLY LEASE TERMINATION FEES. Can you belieeeeeeeeeeeve that? Because CBU purchased our property, they waived the penalty fee of terminating my lease early, which saved meTHOUSANDS of dollars. I HAD to have the property manager repeat herself a few times.
The Lord not only gave me peace in waiting and trusting His ways but He delivered me from a troubling debt that was massively weighing me down.
With that being said, my dear California family, I wanted to inform you all that I have given my management my 30 day notice. My move out date has been set on March 12, 2011. I am excited to see the great things that God will reveal to me in the journey that lies ahead, but at the same time I am sadden that our time together will end shortly. I am terrible at farewells and because I have built so many great relationships here, I know the next few weeks will be a emotional roller coaster. But I am grateful for the opportunity that God had blessed me with to have known such great individuals. I will definitely keep in touch with you and I pray that I will see you all again one day, if not here then in His kingdom.
This is a amazing story that I wanted to share, to encourage you all that its true: "sometimes God takes us out of our storms while during other times He rides along through them". Its obvious that God had placed all of these things in my path since the day I moved here. He knew what hardships I would face and He prepared a way out. PTL forever and ever. Continue to live for Him, and through your trails CLING onto Him. He will never let go, so hold on as much as you can!
I love you all and thank you to my King and to you and your prayers.
Psalm 92:4 For you make me glad by your deeds, O LORD; I sing for joy at the works of your hands
4 significant things in my life. Faith: God; my Creator, Abba, King & Redeemer. Love: love God, love people. Design: strong passion for interior design and art. Create: more than interior design and art, love DIY's!